Terry Girl Sent This To Me - Very Funny

Irish Medical Dictionary
 
 The Irish have the lowest stress rate
 because they do not take medical terminology seriously
 You are going to die anyway, so live life
 

Medical Term  /  Irish Definition

Artery  =  The study of paintings
Bacteria =  Back door to cafeteria
Barium =  What doctors do when patients die
 Benign = what you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section = A neighborhood in Rome
Cat scan = Searching for Kitty

Cauterize = Made eye contact with her
Colic = A sheep dog
 Coma =  A punctuation mark
 Dilate =  To live long
 Enema =  Not a friend
 Fester =  Quicker than someone else
 Fibula =  A small lie
 Impotent =  Distinguished, well known
 Labour Pain =  Getting hurt at work
 Medical Staff =  A Doctor's cane
 Morbid =  A higher offer
 Nitrates =  Rates of Pay for Working at Night,  Normally more money than Days
 Node =  I knew it
 Outpatient =  A person who has fainted
 Pelvis =  Second cousin to Elvis
 Post-Operative =  A letter carrier
 Recovery Room =  Place to do upholstery
 Rectum =  Nearly killed him
 Secretion =  Hiding something
 Seizure =  Roman Emperor
 Tablet =  A small table
 Terminal Illness =  Getting sick at the airport
 Tumour =  One plus one more
 Urine =  Opposite of you're out